Learning Japanese: My Journey So Far · Part 2: Why I Stopped Relying on Motivation

Having a growth mindset is a good start but not enough. Beyond the effort and time required to learn the language, "I don't have motivation anymore" and "Life got in the way" are the most common reasons I hear when someone has stopped learning Japanese. Some are fine with it, but if it matters, we're not without solutions.

I'm not immune to losing motivation, but here's what worked for me.

I don't have motivation anymore

Since reading Atomic Habits by James Clear years ago, I stopped relying on the concept of having or not having motivation to do something. Motivation and excitement usually arise when an external trigger pushes us into action. They are very helpful for starting something or taking action, but they come and go, so they are not reliable.

Instead, it's better to build a system in which a habit grows on its own. Here's an example of how I did it.

First, I needed clarity. I started by setting a long-term goal: to pass the JLPT N3. Then I asked myself: what do I need to do to build a version of myself that can pass the exam? Who do I need to become? I like these questions as they center around identity.

Fortunately, many people had already walked this path before me, and I could pick up things to create my own path. After doing some research, I broke down my long-term goal into steps like finishing the textbook Minna no Nihongo. Next, I broke it down even more to get an everyday actionable goal like 1 lesson per day.

When doing this research and planning phase, it's easy to get trapped trying to craft the perfect study plan. I avoided that by setting a deadline.

Atomic Habits goes even further. It simplifies and removes friction as much as possible. For example, you grab the book, open it to the page for lesson 1, then close it. You repeat it every day, then little by little you add more things like reading the first 10 vocabulary words. The process goes on, and the focus is on creating the habit because the most difficult part is getting started.

And to ease the start even more, we can change the environment. I made what I needed to do visible. I added reminders to my Google Calendar and stuck post-its with my daily goals where I could see them often. As strange as it may sound, every day before going to sleep, I opened the book to the page I needed to study and put it on the floor. I always had the urge to pick it up because it bothered me, which helped trigger the action to start my lesson.

The last piece of my system was a habit-tracking journal where I listed my daily goals and ticked them off each time I did them. I used Google Sheets, but another tool that does the same thing is fine. The journal helps build proof and confidence that fuels motivation. I always feel good seeing a week with a perfect or almost perfect streak. One thing to keep in mind is that it doesn't need to be perfect. If the task was to do 30 min of reading but I only did 5 min, that counts! The most important thing is to keep the habit streak going, even if it's not 100% done.

Instead of waiting for motivation, taking action leads to motivation and creates a virtuous cycle. Motivation is fragile, and goals are here only to provide clarity. It's better to build a system that pushes toward action, and reaching goals then becomes a byproduct of the process.

Now that the habit is there, I feel like something is missing on days without Japanese. Humans are creatures of habit, and by taking control of our habits, we can overcome the constant need for motivation to push forward.

Life got in the way

Aside from really big life-changing situations, "life got in the way" is somewhat related to motivation.

When digging further, people tend to say that they lost motivation. But we now know that always relying on motivation doesn't work in the long term, and the solution is a system that fosters habits.

When "life happens", it means the streak is not going well or has stopped. If building the system doesn't work either, the reason lies elsewhere. It could be an identity issue or a priority issue.

Questions that can help are:

• Why did I start learning Japanese?
• Do I still want to learn Japanese?
• Given my current priorities, does Japanese still have a place?

It's fine to let go and move on. Life will always happen. The reasons we find to explain why we're not regular in our study or have stopped will always be valid. But does it serve us? Does our self-narrative serve us? If not, we need to do something about it and take responsibility.

When this situation happens to me, I start by asking the questions mentioned above. If it's truly important, it needs to show up on my top priority list, then in my system, taking shape as a set of daily actions.

Negative emotions as leverage

Comparison is a poison of the mind if not controlled. It's one of the things that can easily push us to give up, even with the right mindset and a habit system in place.

We need to protect ourselves from comparing ourselves to others, particularly on social media. Otherwise, we might think there's something wrong with not being able to get the JLPT N2 in one year or less with a nearly perfect score.

We need to remember that it's our own journey, on our own terms.

I used the word "protect" because it's very hard (maybe impossible) to resist the impulse to compare ourselves with others. In my case, while quite extreme, if a social media platform doesn't help me achieve what I want, I just remove it. I only use YouTube, but in a focused way to learn what I need. Instead of trying to resist or confront it, sometimes it's better to reduce exposure to sources that can trigger unhealthy comparisons.

Unfortunately, comparison is still inevitable, and with it, the negative emotions that can surface. It takes self-awareness to catch when we're in this state.

Instead of blocking or repressing them, the best way I've found is to use them as fuel to take massive action. For example, after a social event or watching content featuring a foreigner speaking "perfect Japanese", if I catch myself feeling frustrated that I'm a slow learner compared to others or I don't have that "talent" for it, I use it as a trigger to double down on my lessons.

It works quite well, and I would even say that negative emotions are one of the most powerful triggers for action. But it's often an outburst. Some people can ride that wave for a long time without it seeming to cost them anything. But I don't think that's really the case. Staying in that state for too long starts to wear on us: our health, our relationships, our identity. It's better to think of it as a state mode we can switch when we need it.

The long game

Learning Japanese or any language is like a long game with its highs and lows. A growth mindset, a system of habits, and self-awareness of harmful comparisons keep us going until we reach the end. But what is the end or when does it end? It's up to us to decide when we feel satisfied. The important thing is that when we decide to stop playing, we can move on to the next game without too many regrets.

Now that I've shared what helped me keep studying even after 4 years, in Part 3, I'll go into the specifics of my daily routine and a few tools and resources I'd recommend.